Thursday, August 30, 2012

Spilling it

I have always wanted to be an FBI pro-file'r.

There are many days where my eyes bug out of my head.

I like to be comfy and probably wear pajamas more than clothes some times.

I am secretly worried about Charlie's vocabulary. I know she is only 16 months old but both boys were so talkative at this point.

Kittens are cute but I dislike cats. 

I love the beach but not a real fan of swimming in the ocean.

Runny noses are gross. Even my own kids.

I only put away laundry once a week but I usually do 2 loads a day.

I am not a fan of paying full price for things. I spend time online searching out deals. I buy ahead so that my kids can wear adorable clothes that do not cost a fortune!

I am a planner. Spreadsheets are my friend.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Wordless Wednesday - Many faces of fun

Monday, August 27, 2012

5th grade

Getting ready, Logan got up early with Brubber and got ready with him. Adorable!

My handsome guy

Libby is nervous about Dom being gone all day

Breakfast and games on the phone

Dom saying goodbye to Libby and the littles chasing after

He is sooo big

Almost time for the bus

Super excited to have class with his friends

I get a locker of my own this year!

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Printcopia canvas prints

I am excited to give you the opportunity to decorate your home and save money! I LOVE LOVE LOVE canvas prints. I have them in my home and always will.

It will expire 9/15/2012. Promo applies a full 50% off + standard shipping on photo to canvas prints.

With the Grand Opening,  $300 Best Buy giveaway on our facebook page running until Monday! Hurry and good luck!

Summers End

We went to Conneaut Lake Park yesterday for our last big horrah before school begins on Monday. We had fun as a family but the park left something to be desired.

Uneven pavement. Only a few rides. One place to get drinks and eat. No water fountains. Run down buildings. Burnt down buildings. Only a few park employees that had to keep walking back and forth from one game to another or one ride to another.

A nice part of the park

Not so nice part

Despite the heat and lack of park appeal, the kids rode rides. Gary and Dom went off on their own for a bit while the little ones ate corn dogs and fries. Ethan did not like any rides at all. So he sat back and watched while my three rode. He was a side line cheerleader! The kids giggled. Smiled. I even rode a roller coaster, which I have not done in 4 years since my back surgery. It felt like a cheap chiro appointment!

Dom sneaking in on a ride in kiddie land. He is only 1.7 million feet too tall for!

Come on Mom, let me out of this stroller. I want to RUN!

Charlie is suspicious of riding

Logan is trying to please Mommy with a fake smile

Slowest carousel ever

Charlie LOVED the big carrousel

Daddy/daughter bonding time

Waving to Mommy

It was interesting to see this park that has been around for 120 years. It looked nothing like what I remember as a child but I am glad my kids got to experience it.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Saturday Top Five Laughs

This was our first week of transition into our new routines so I did not really write down laughs.

5. Last night both boys were gone for sleep overs. Charlie enjoyed being an only child for night and having all the attention. She went back and forth from mommy to daddy over and over. Giggling. Smiling.

4. My Mom took Logan to camp for the weekend with my Aunt and cousins. He is having a blast. My Aunt sent me a video of Logan jumping around and singing and dancing at McDonalds. 

3. Charlie makes animal sounds: A cow; Ooooo (instead of moo), A cat; yowwww, A dog; oof, A duck; quack quack quack. Her lips are always big fishy lips while she makes her sounds. And her eyes are very wide.

2. Charlie came up to me with her arm out and I thought she wanted a hug. Nope, she wanted to steel my pretzel. She is sly that one.

1. It was chilly out one morning. Instead of putting Charlie in pants, my MIL put her in butterfly shorts and a pink tank top. Then she kept on her babylegs with pink and white stripes on them. And then added a blue zip up hooding with mermaids on it. My daughter looked like a clown. It was comical!

Monday, August 20, 2012

Confessions of reality

Everyone gets in a rut now and again, yes?! I am all about keeping it real. Life is life. It is not perfect. It is hard. It is a never ending constant roller coaster of emotions, controlled chaos and hoops.

I have been in one for half of the summer. I have tried to not let it affect things. I still take my kids to fun things. We have been on vacation to the beach and a small get away to camp. We go on weekly play dates. We do weekly swimming and dinner with friends. We have been frequent visitors to the zoo.
But I have officially popped. Like a nasty pimpled on your forehead. POP

I have been feeling blue. Down. Not like myself. More of just a mom of three. I have not even really felt like a wife lately. I feel as if I lost the person that I used to be. I am tired. Exhausted. Frustrated.  Over whelmed and under appreciated.

My stress level is through the roof. There really is no end in sight for it. I really never talk about it because there is no use in being a negative Nancy to friends and family. Situations arise and you work at them. However, since I hit my breaking point on holding it all in...I am going to blog about it. I will get it all out and maybe I will feel better. Maybe. If not then tis life.

I work. A lot. On a typical week, I work more than 40 hours squished into 4 days. I am very thankful that my company allows me to work 4 days to avoid more daycare costs. To be honest, when my kids are in daycare, I am not making much. 2 toddlers in a daycare is costly. However, working long hours has its negatives. Dinner is rushed. Baths are rushed. Very little down time at night.
My job is not easy. I have to maintain a level of 99% accuracy to keep it. I research contracts. Apply them. Crunch numbers. All while being next to perfect. Stress all the live long day.

I have 3 kids to keep up with. 2 of which are toddlers who constantly get into things, climb, run in opposite directions, need held tons and cannot do anything for themselves. The tween is in his lovely hormonal period of life. It is almost deal-able on a good day but on a bad day, whoa! Stress every day. Some days are good stress, other days not so much. I have gray hairs. TONS of them with my kids' names written all over.
The days that I work, the kids are here (except during the school year they are at daycare one day a week) with a sitter. I can hear them. The house is not really quiet.  I can tune them out with listening to music or the television. It is still not easy. I manage. I do get frustrated. I deal.
I have horrible mommy guilt when I can hear them call out for me and cry because they just want to sit on my lap. Or when I go through the living room to use the rest room or get a drink from the kitchen, they latch on like little monkeys. All of it puts extra stress on me. Makes me feel like a horrible mom that I am not able to stay home with them full time.
Not only are the kids a bit stressful during the day, but they are at night too. Both toddlers are up at least once every single night. It is rare when they both sleep through. This has left me tired and drained. Making my body and mind more pushed to the limit!

I have no hired help for the house. Gary and I do all the cleaning. All the laundry. All the projects. All the shopping. All the outside work. For those of you who can afford extra help, you are lucky. I am a bit jealous! I cannot do both hired help and a daycare day. I wish I could. There are 10 million things that I would rather be doing than scrubbing a toilet or mopping a floor. The hardest part is that we have toddlers and they will not allow us to get things done. Gary and I have to basically take turns with cleaning and watching the kids to get it done and avoid non stop crying.

I feel like I have a roommate and not a husband. Not because either one of us is doing something wrong. Or that we are no longer in love. Just because there is very little time to ourselves. Most week days we do not even get a chance to have a normal conversation. It makes things rough.

I love my kids. I love my husband. I love my family. I call our house organized chaos. Which it really is. I am an organized person but the crazy has taken over. I fell over whelmed almost daily.

With all of this going on, I have been thinking non stop about a way to make things better. Easier. More organized in hopes to give me more time in a day. A moment to breath. A few minutes to have time with my husband. Maybe sleep through the night.

My ideas are spreadsheets, calendars and better routines. Things will be getting tight shipped around here. Bed times are going to be earlier. Strict with new rules. Chores will be done daily in an organized way.

I will start doing things to make myself feel better. I will get healthy. I will bring back the person that I used to be. The person who is not just a working mom of three or a wife. I will be bringing Tracy back. 

My hopes are that things start to get easier after we take the initial month to get used to all the changes. I figured with school starting next week that there is no time like the present. Hoping that my stress goes down. My laughs go up. We acquire more time in a day. I smile more. I frown and worry less. Get back everything that I feel has gone astray.

I am sure that I am not alone. I know people go through things and may not be strong enough to share. I am hoping that me opening up will allow someone else to have the strength to let out what is going on inside them.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

A Day at the Farm

I have mentioned a few times that I met a great group of Mommys and baby girls from twitter and blogging. We met up last fall and have been keeping up with play dates and outings. This summer we had almost weekly outings. It has been a blast. The summer flew by.  Our last horrah was at Soergels Farm.

We all arrived after lunch for the kids to play in the playhouses, pet the animals at the petting zoo and run around to release bottled up energy.

The kids had a blast. To tell you the truth, I do not even know how many kids we had there! We have children ranging in age from 1 year to 13 years old. A great group of kids. They mostly get along well but as we know, kids will be kids!

The Moms enjoyed conversations as we watched all the littles and bigs have fun. The kids even got a train cookie after playing!

It was a great day and sad that Amy has to return to teaching. She will no longer be able to join us weekly. Which also means, we need to schedule some weekend stuff!

Thank you all ladies for a wonderful fun filled summer. It truly has been one of the best summers yet!!

Friday, August 17, 2012

Saturday Top Five Laughs

dentistmelsbbutton Saturdays Top Five Laughs  Come join our Blog Hop!

This week was busy. I mean, doing something every single day busy. Welcome to this weeks laughs, some may have you rolling on the floor. You've been WARNED! This week is all Logan. The kid kills with his funnies.

5. Every morning, Logan gets up and takes his pull up off. He shakes his twig and berries at us and says "It my penis! Look at my penis."

4. Gary and his friends have a game that they play, gaddafi (from the show Tosh.0). Logan has learned this game. He may or may not have done it to Dylan after swimming. And Dylan may have been getting dressed behind a beach towel.

3. Logan has decided that he will fight us on what he is wearing. He has to pick his own clothes, shoes, socks and undies. He also likes to match his undies to his shirts. He also has to show you that he matched his undies to his shirt.

2. Logan has become a photo bomber. While Stef and her family were getting their pictures taken for Lily's first birthday, Logan grabbed a hold of Stef's leg and cheesed it up. Big smiles! Everyone laughed and said that they attained another child along the way.

1. While at our friend's first birthday party, Logan was being wild and crazy. He kept taking off his shoes and running around after the big kids. As we were sitting around talking, Steph says to me "Look at Logan." I look up to find him climbing up a very high hill side. No shoes. After it just rained. The hill is straight up about 2 stories. No fear that one. We had to get Dominic to pull him up the rest of the way up, then Andrew to help Dom so he did not slip and fall. Scary while it happened but totally something that Logan would do and we laugh hard at it now.